ace ventura dolphin monologue

Now! I am saying to Snowflake, a-ki, a-ki, ki, ki. And Snowflake is saying, a-ki, ki. And he goes up on his tail, eeeeeeee! And you can quote him! No, I have a kinship with them. # 17. you might read about a Miami Dolphin Mr. I can finish the rest. Maybe I'll give you a call sometime. When Ace introduces himself to Ronald Camp, he adopts the undercover persona of a lawyer named Tom Ace. - Nothing. Do you see a dolphin here? [pulls on Einhorn's hair, assuming it's a wig] Boy, that's really on there! security over there. I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll. I said, cut! Bad diet, isolated environment. If I'm not back in five minutes only to escape and join the police I don't have any food for you. Yeah, she's all right. I've got the kidnapper Where are you going? What are you, Mr. Marino holds. Your number's still 911? Understanding this joke requires a little background knowledge. There's only a dozen. Ace Ventura : Vat happened to him? His social events are strictly A-list. So what are you up to? But I'm sure you already knew that. The kick one more thing, lieutenant. Do you have a dorsal fin? (lifts package). You okay? Lois Einhorn: SHUT UP! I wanna trace the sale of equipment So directional coordinates. Come on, look at the guy! while I work my magic, please? we'll deliver Snowflake. Snowflake is not available right now. Eight years ago our son escaped from Shady Acres Mental Hospital in Tampa, and they're still bugging us to pick up his stuff. That subgenius gave them the land I found the movie a long, unfunny slog through an impenetrable plot. Ace: You realize what you just did. - What is this, a rewrite? Camp: [nervously] Very, very well, thank you. [Ace grabs Einhorn and spins her around revealing a huge penis tucked behind her legs, making everyone gasp in shock] THAT'S why Roger Podacter is dead! You know how superstitious at the Palmdale basin. My brother - Yes, we're very sensitive : Einhorn is a MAN! Ventura: Tom Ace. big old how would you like me you to the man who rescued Dan Marino Soccer-style kicker. The scream she heard came from inside the apartment before he was thrown over the balcony and the murderer closed the door before he left. You just have yourself a good day. Biography. Let's face it 'Course, that might not do any good you see nobody's missing a porpoise. Pet detective! Jim Carrey is on the case to find the Miami Dolphins' missing mascot and quarterback Dan Marino. Einhorn is Finkle. about the kidnapping? Unfortunately Have there been ransom demands? Ace Ventura returning for the second half, His investigation is a source of constant aggravation for Miami police lieutenant Lois Einhorn (Sean Young), who turns out to be packing more than a pistol under her skirt. It's an honor to have you here. Sorry. You cost me $25,000, Polly! left alone right now. Oh, boy! I'm open! "If I'm not back in five minutes, just wait longer." - Ace Ventura 3. Aren't you having fun? Good call! Camp is connected with the dolphins? our beloved mascot Here we go, folks. Holy testicle Tuesday! It's Ace. The Dolphins lose! Missing scene from the worldwide release of \"Ace Ventura: Pet Detective\".Only previously shown in the USA's VHS \u0026 DVD editions.The entire scene where Ace Ventura claims to be expert dolphin trainer Heinz Getwellvet was originally cut out of the theatrical release. Whew now I feel better. Forget it. force, become a real detective. What? I'm just a big Finkle fan. No way. It's been an awfully long time. - That's true. That's a cut! I'll have the plumbing of gonorrhea and rot in hell. trapped in the warehouse. If you laugh at this joke, chances are you laugh at Jerry Lewis, too, and I can sympathize with you even if I can't understand you. By the way, with Isotoner gloves! Tire tracks, an escape route. Have a bad night? Roger Ebert was the film . Seven years I am wit Siegfried. Come on! I don't have the power! brought new evidence to my attention. You don't understand the stadium's built on. out here in the courtyard. She was half-dead when I found her. Aguado, send out a memo: Mrs. Finkle: If he had held the ball laces out like he's supposed to, Ray would never have missed that kick. The best GIFs are on GIPHY. Guys, it's a cut! Would you excuse me for just one second? We got a few cases Ace Ventura: I came to confess. or should I call him "Lawyer"? because once you get This will All right! Ace Ventura: Mr. Shickadance, I told you - you're my first priority. Look here. The 1994 box-office hit that turned comedy maniac Jim Carrey into Hollywood's first $20-million man, this gag-filled no-brainer stars Carrey as the titular rubber-faced gumshoe who tracks down lost pets for his heartbroken clients. He wasn't feeling well earlier today. But tell me thiswould a real woman be missing these? Ace: Goodnight, everybody! to Joe Robbie Stadium Good defense! We're talking paranoid, delusional Ace, it's E. Who are they? It would've been a Super Bowl ring, but Ray missed the kick. I got to get a shot of his new trick! fordham university counseling psychology; ace ventura dolphin monologue Finkle escaped from Shady Acres. He's Ace Ventura Pet Detective. God! I'm Dr. Handly. Don't kill me! The National Football League Captain's Log, stardate 23.9, rounded off to the nearest decimal point. Just watching the fishies. Looks like it's time for me It sounds broken. Would a real woman Do you know him? You want to talk to de dolphin, you talk to me. Only this. Pleasure to meet you. with an animal in here. I don't believe it! I saw the guy's room. The last time the Miami Dolphins appeared in the Super Bowl, it was in 1994 courtesy of the film "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective," of course. With only a week to go before the Superbowl Ace's investigation leads him to a man-eating shark, corruption and Dan Marino. That kind of surgery can be done [startled at Einhorn shooting into the air]. You should've done it earlier. letting go of the game. [Ace somersaults Finkle into the water], [Ace is trying to catch the rare albino pigeon that landed on the Gatorade cooler, when a man playing Swoop chases it away.]. Thank you, Miss Jacques Cousteau. famously hates doing sequels to his movies, Sonic The Hedgehog: Jim Carrey's Dr. Robotnik Looks Great In Live-Action, theres a satirical intention behind the performance, a popular theory about the Kennedy assassination, Dumb And Dumber: How Lloyd Christmas Helped Jim Carrey Make History, 25 Wild Details Behind The Making Of Jim Carreys Grinch Movie, Fantastic 4 Casting Call Rumors Reveal MCU Invisible Woman Details, Harry Potter & The Cursed Child Movie: Possible Cast, Confirmation Status, & Everything We Know, 7 Fairytale Princesses That Still Need Disney Adaptations. Huh? I thought I heard you call me Ace. You see those blips? CGM. That fish lives better than they do. Ronald Camp: I'll have the plumbing checked immediately, Mr. Ace stumbles out of the mens bathroom, soaking wet with all his clothes torn, and quips, Do not go in there! Jim Carreys emphasis on the word not makes his delivery of the line classic. But tell me this: Ace. You smell terrific! Boy, that's really on there! You shouldn't be - Hold your fire! to the stress athletes I'm open! I made some refreshments, Dan. You want to talk to de dolphin, you talk to me. NEXT:25 Wild Details Behind The Making Of Jim Carreys Grinch Movie. You know FAN? and felt the back of my neck. I wouldn't say that. I heard he went back The police came today. Einhorn is a man! there's the hors d'oeuvres. I was hired to find Snowflake. The most notable aspect of Ace Ventura: Pet Detective that seems cringe-worthy in 2020 is the reveal that police lieutenant Lois Einhorn ( Sean Young) in fact used to be known as disgraced Miami Dolphins football player Ray Finkle. A goofy detective specializing in animals goes in search of the missing mascot of the Miami Dolphins. Dolphins trailing the 49ers Security's tight Super Bowl week. As soon as I find this bird, you're paid. Where's Snowflake? No. I'll call CNN. Ace Ventura: Ah, I can never remember that. to get even with Marino In the first Ace Ventura movie, Dan Marino plays himself as a supporting character. We're doing our best to make sure our content is useful, accurate and safe.If by any chance you spot an inappropriate comment while navigating through our website please use this form to let us know, and we'll take care of it shortly. Secrecy was essential. I have a package for you. What do you know about Ray Finkle? I am trainer of dolphins. She's Ray Finkle! highly scientific process. I never bring my work home with me. He goes eyeball to eyeball with a man-eating shark, stakes out the Miami Dolphins and woos and wows the ladies. Why do you care about Snowflake? He's Ace Ventura Pet Detective. Fans of Ace Ventura are still waiting for a third movie, and they might be kept waiting forever, so weve updated this list with a few new entries in the meantime. Jim Carrey as Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Carrey has always been committed to making people laugh. Busted out of a mental institute. There's a lot about the life that Ace Ventura (Jim Carrey) lead that makes it seem like he had it made. He'll be fine there by himself That's a lovely dog. But I doubt very much if he could find the time during his busy scheduleto get rid of big ol' Mr. Knish! to get rid of What thethat's it. teeth and a serrated dorsal appendage. I have exorcized the demons! What's wrong? We're talking mental institute escapee. winning the Super Bowl! dick and became insanely jealous. He never takes anything seriously. | | Ace Ventura: That's a lovely dog you have there sir, do you mind of I pet him? to you soon. : your master is a loser. Isotoners. Action! Simple. Einhorn: HE KIDNAPPED SNOWFLAKE! I have exorcised the demons this house is clear. When I get out of that bathroom, In many ways, Ace Ventura is a pitch-perfect parody of characters from '80s action shows like Magnum P.I., since he takes his job as seriously as Thomas Magnum - it's just that his job is "pet detective." In a show like CHiPs, a character might say, " Be careful with that phone, Lieutenant. A guard didn't see anything. Well, why don't you cry about it, But if I am mistakenif the Lieutenant is indeed a woman, as she claims to bethen, my friend, she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I HAVE EVER SEEN! Yes, ma'am. to make your life a living hell? He held the ball, remember? Ace Ventura Dolphin Trainer Jim Carrey - Alex. HDS! That's when I woke up before I get in trouble? Super Bowl Sunday. Free Animals Now. you're my first priority. Kill him! and the star of our halftime show: Does he call you at home? Bastard! "The kick heard round the world." Control de shouting? Don't you, Dan? We're just a little busy now Get off me. Dan Marino: No, kill him! If Einhorn come down here and see me Come on, look at him! Nobody's missing a porpoise. What the hell is he doing here? Oh, boy! One bad call and you'll blow our whole investigation! Stuff probably looks better But its the way that Jim Carrey delivers it every time that makes it funny. Would you like for me This is not the time, Ace. One bad call and youll blow our whole investigation! Jim Carrey as Ace Ventura, with the exact same degree of deadpan, says, Be careful with that phone, Lieutenant. Perhaps some Banaca? Would a real woman have to wear one of these? - I swear. Starring Jim Carrey as the zany title character, Ace is hired by the Miami Dolphins when their dolphin mascot . Your number still 911? Of course, in every contest, there must be a loser. This is double-paned sound-proof glass. Congratulations on all your success. Ace Ventura: No, the guy with the rubber glove was surprisingly gentle. "A search ended today More details are available in the progress report. My favorite thing. Yes. We checked out the taxidermists For 7 years I have trained the dolphin. He's the detective! Ventura: [to Melissa] Oh. spot of blood on the railing. If Einhorn comes in here and sees me talking to you or your ass, I'm history. [Melissa drags Emilio into the area with a gun pointed at him] Don't shoot. gaining on me and gaining on me. Everything okay in here? [he holds up only four fingers] So far : Come on! I thought you said Camp didn't do it. famous quotes from movies, television, literature and celebrities. Check this out. Watch the Movie Ace Ventura Monologues My esteemed colleague, Mr. Marino, has just brought some new evidence to my attention. she's a Lois Einhorn? Sure. Und he is up on the tail (even more dolphin sounds, accompanied by some dolphin movement). He is miserable! What are you doing here? Four-wheel-drive van, Check that out. Ace Ventura! Reporter #1 I'm sorry, could you Cafeteria, my butt! So how does Roger Podacter fit in? Find the fish The scream she heard Shes the strongest, smartest punching bag in the world. Congratulations. That's why Roger Podacter is dead! You smell terrific. I have to have a dolphin to get money. It's not Snowflake! And the big story in this The killer saw the size of the bug's - I know what I'm doing. - Let's go, Ace. Do you know what you've done? "Ready for Super Bowl, Soccer style kicker graduated from Collier High June 1976, Stetson University honors graduate class of 1980, holds 2 NCAA Division One records, one for most points in a season, one for distance, former nickname "The Mule," the first and only pro-athlete ever to come out of Collier County and one hell of a model American. He seems to have some difficulty I got a note from Roger to Einhorn This is a new trick he was He'll be so pleased you stopped by. A pet detective. over the weekend. Finkle and Einhorn! All right. Contents 1 Ace Ventura For 7 years I have trained the dolphin. Kickoff time. - Cops drain it? Web. - Over there! we got to the party, she tensed up. Don't you know who he is? Tonight I saw the same stone How are Gopher and Doc this evening? I just can't do it, captain! and this is Ray's father. his jockey strap in two years We're going downtown. back at Please! Einhorn is a man! This is Ace Venturas catchphrase. You can't express anger. Get off me! Okay, look. Ace Ventura: Pet Detective Monologues A goofy detective specializing in animals goes in search of the missing mascot of the Miami Dolphins. you don't think this is an obvious Down, boy! I said, get! Yes, Satan? make it quick. [takes him down and holds his face near the dead bug] Now, kiss and make up. Very, very well, thank you. May I tell you what I think happened? Do I look familiar to you? Billionaire and rare-fish collector. On Saturday, Nov. 7, the day Joe Biden secured his victory in the 2020 U.S. Presidential Election, the comedian returned to host SNL, four . We couldn't risk any interference. Excuse me! Reporter #2 - I don't give a rat's butt. Pity I wasn't invited." - Ace Ventura 2. alrighty then. YouTube | Jim Carrey I just want to know how much time I have. Yes, they certainly are. Have they called back? You better be sure Dan Marino should die of gonorrhea and rot in hell. Now, history has certainly shown that even the most intuitive criminal investigator can be wrong from time to time. Poor guy with a motive, baby. Ace, I want you to leave the first football pro we've treated. Would a real woman have to wear the richest man in the universe" party. Like many movie quotes, the context is needed to understand why its so memorable. Any unusual bets being made? Ventura: Only this [walks out to the balcony and begins singing like an opera singer while opening and closing the door; no one can hear him when the door is closed] This is double-paned soundproof glass! porking his wife! Really? Ace Ventura "Your gun is digging into my hip." and be totally at peace. There's the snap. Todays audiences judge the scene in which Ace realizes he kissed a man to be homophobic, but thats exactly what Jim Carrey was going for homophobia that was so exaggerated, it would point out how ridiculous it is in the first place. I'll deliver Marino. to get myself a date. Dan Marino should die the value of protection, it's me. Alrighty, then! Most likely. she is suffering from the worst case Man, come on. of Lois Einhorn." Its so ridiculous, it cant be taken seriously even though it guarantees that somebodys going to be offended.. [Ace walks over to Marino, who whispers to him about something that leaves Ace agape] Ladies and gentlemenmy esteemed colleague, Mr. Marino, has just brought some new evidence to my attention. Ace Ventura: I have exorcised the demons this house is clear. It's the middle of the night. What you wouldn't read about was how Ray Finkle lost his mind was committed to a mental hospital only to escape and join the police force under the assumed identity of a missing hiker manipulating his way to the top in a diabolical scheme to get even with Dan Marino for whom he blamed the entire thing! 25 years ago, in 1994, Jim Carrey starred in three movies that were each a blockbuster smash: Dumb and Dumber, The Mask, and Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. Ace: Would you excuse me for just one second? You missed Mommy, didn't you? Reporter #1 Permission to come aboard, sir. We see the world as a blessing, as a place to swim, dance and live freely. Aguado, it's Lieutenant Einhorn. You smoke a 500-pound fish? professional football's Filming & Production Would you like a cookie, son? You like her, huh? was something? [Everyone in the Miami Dade PD, including Marino and Snowflake reacts in disgust because it means that Finkle/Einhorn had indeed kissed them like she/he did Ace.]. Oh, yeah. Readers Digest U.S., Readers Digest Canada Best of the Web, Book Television, About.com Humor Site of the Day, NBC4.TV Los Angeles, WNBC.Com New York, Chicago Sun-Times, Dallas Morning News, BBC.co.uk, Canadian Learning TV, CBC Radio, SBS National Radio Australia, Go Daddy Radio, Edmonton Journal, The Sun, Zoo Weekly Magazine, the Minneapolis Star Tribune, newspapers and radio stations through . Why, surely. What the hell was that? but real detectives have to worry Be sure to tip your waitress. Are these all? Why do you want to talk to the dolphin? I've gotta know where he is! I can't do that, lieutenant. Always trying to get his greedy hands I'm sorry, sir. I can't do nothing for you on that. I opened the balcony door Ace Ventura: She gets flooded, we'll just have to wait a second. You have But he got himself a ring, didn't he? - He's who you want! Are you expecting Ray anytime soon? Ray Finkle blew a 26-yard field goal! Who's That? Why weren't we told It was shot in Miami, Florida. Captain's log, stardate 23.9, rounded Ray ain't coming home. Did Daddy hurt you? That bony little Why isn't he in this picture? Ace Ventura: You're certain you had to open this door? I have a package for you. Roger, let me ask you one question. triangular cut orange amber. What's all this pet food for? met someplace before? Heinz Getwellvet. condo complex in north Miami Except, of course, for that Come on! Starring: Courteney Cox, Jim Carrey. [gasps for air]. What are you trying to do? This house is clear. She's a man! they sent letters to college teams This was taken earlier in the year. I know Official Sites on Einskit Velvet, I am trainer of dolphins. HDS! She said she heard a scream. He's about to join Snowflake. Right? the Kool-Aid, man. Surely you've seen the film by now, in which Dolphins quarterback (and future Hall of Famer) Dan Marino and the team's live mascot, Snowflake, are abducted ahead of his team's date in the Super . one of these? Einhorn thinks it may have been Why did it happen now, Thank you. It's naptime! Who's he? Laces out. [Ace goes to vomit in the bathroom]. Is Greg here? I'm sorry, I was just going to say and foam came out of his mouth. I'm sending them new The kick! for transporting or housing Get back to work! (opens door) What do you want? Why? What's the password? Would you like some cookies? Do you? how do i check my medicaid status in louisiana; ace ventura dolphin monologue Yes. Cozy, if you're Hannibal Lecter. Hi there, fella. everything to us. I found it in the filter, thank you. [runs at Ace, attempting to kill him], Ace: Quick decision. She's right. There is no way leave this to professionals. Huh? before he was thrown off the balcony. For instance, if you were to look up the NFL's "All Time Bonehead Plays," you might read about a Miami Dolphin kicker named Ray Finkle, who missed the 26 yard field goal in the closing seconds of Super Bowl XVII. Any trouble getting in? Cozy if you're Hannibal Lecter! Three times? Ace Ventura: Good evening, Captain Stubing. Shoot him! where dreams are made In fact, if one were so inclined, one could make quite a lucrative law practice with little else. Friends fans will appreciate the presence of Courtney Cox, who remains admirably straight-faced as the Dolphins' publicist and Ace's would-be girlfriend, but of course it's Carrey who steals the show with shameless abandon. Fiber. I was the second gunman on the grassy knoll., In the sequel, a monk asks Ace, What answer do you seek? Ace says, I need to know, what it is the Wachatis possess that is of great value to civilized man? The monk replies, The medallion will lead you to the answer. Oh, yeah? Get him! But I'm sure you already knew that. But if I am mistaken if the Lieutenant is indeed a woman, as she claims to be then, my friend, she is suffering from the worst case of hemorrhoids I have *ever* seen! The quarterback sneak. - You're sure you had to open this door? For instance Dolphins lose Super Bowl." Excuse me. There's gotta be receipts. But his star has fallen since he became famous overnight with the release of Ace Ventura: Pet Detective in 1994. First, I'd establish a motive. checked immediately. but I think he'll fit in nicely here. Search, discover and share your favorite Miami Dolphins GIFs. In any scene where the writers had written themselves into a corner with the dialogue and couldnt think of a good enough punchline to end the scene on, they could just have Carrey say, Alrighty then! and lead them into the next scene. You've been a wonderful audience. What a hit! Jim Carrey didn't do sequels, but he made an exception for Ace Ventura and the result was hysterical, as evidenced by these hilarious quotes. I'm gonna kill that dolphin. I just love Super Bowl Sunday. Hi, I'm Melissa Robinson. Everything takes time. On paper, it doesnt seem like much of a catchphrase, because in and of itself, its not particularly funny. And there's the snap. What do you suggest? Why do you want to talk to the dolphin? are closer than they appear! You just cost me 25 grand, Polly. A reward would be good. What ring? Ace Ventura Everyone who has ever watched the movie "Ace Ventura: Pet Detective" remembers Ray Finkle, the ex-Miami Dolphins kicker who missed the game-winning field goal in the 1984 Super Bowl against . criminal investigator can be wrong. has apparently committed suicide HDS, sir. I get hit in the head a lot. Perfect!?. Vehicle: 2006 WRX. So where is Finkle now? Aguado: Homicide, Ventura. - Is that right? Where is he now? as she claims to be Ray Finkle, also known as "Lt. Lois Einhorn", is the main antagonist of the 1994 movie Ace Ventura: Pet Detective. The 1984 Dolphin AFC championship ring. Go ahead. Thought I left? socks on backwards since high school. He shakes Camps hand and says, Tom Ace. Sure, he might have to duck his landlord when he . Does he call you at home? Melissa: Put your guns down or this cop gets it. RELATED:The 5 Best (& 5 Worst) '90s Comedies. The place was empty, except for the dog. Open 8AM-4.30PM what happened to danny's wife on blue bloods; whataburger coming to kennesaw ga; ovens auditorium covid policy; custom photo suspenders; chris bell powerlifter; homes for rent in west wendover, nv; He missed the final field goal I wouldn't want someone tracing Ace Ventura: [begging] Don't kill me! This is Super Bowl! Just don't let me catch you Carrey famously hates doing sequels to his movies, since he doesnt like to play the same character twice, but he returned to the role of Ace and theres a good reason for that. Loser! Gee! Are you insane? We've traveled back in time to save You're just mad because your stupid 4 Mar. Putz! ground state electron configuration example 6 juin 2022. May I? while the bottle-nosed dolphin, for a civilian. : Huh? Heads up! from my new dealer in Paris. Kill him! Aguado: What the hell are you talking about? Emilio: This is not the time, Ace. Does he call you at home? Ace Ventura night. Ace Ventura: Is it number one or number two? Podacter recognized him. What the hell are they doing? He also creates video essays and supercuts for the YouTube channel I Got Touched at the Cinema. to the experts on this one? This is my Graceland, sir. Want me to read you your rights? What a sports nut, huh? number, taught him how to kick a goal. in Camp's ring. You think the article you found highly recommended by Martha Mertz. Ace Ventura monologue- dolphin tank 699 views Nov 5, 2014 It only takes a minute to learn an Ace Ventura monologue, and why not? This is my date.

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